Here’s a little ray of light out in the economic darkness: Apple has seen profits 26% thanks to nearly 7m sales of the iPhone. They’ll be thankful of the £683m in the bank as they warn that they are expecting this Christmas to pinch a bit. Sales of computers were up 21% and iPods 8%. The thing with Apple is they keep innovating and keep designing products that most grown men would like to marry. They don’t rest on their laurels and that’s why they can charge more and sell more, when the rest of the market are suffering a glitch. Steve Jobs? Steve Jobs Done.

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Who’d have thunk it: the retailers that seem to be selling napkins for the credit crunch as those online (no nasty rents) and those selling cheap (8 chickens for a quid!). Blow me (please) but eBay that meets both those criteria, is feeling the pinch – and is axing 10%, or 1,000, of its staff. Odd then that while announcing this sad news, the firm told us all to cheer up as it was to embark on a $1.3bn spending spree of other companies - it is paying cash for Danish online classifieds site dba and vehicles website bilbasen for approximately $390m. It is also buying – for $820m cash - internet payments company, Bill Me Later. This firm takes on your shopping debts and lumps them into monthly payments you pay off with cheques or cash. Of course, you need cash to pay it off…has everyone really forgotten about sub prime mortgages so soon?!!

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There’s a better reason than normal as to why I had a pint of Carlsberg with my breakfast this morning: It was to show my appreciation to a firm taking their staff training seriously. For Carlsberg will close its Leeds brewery for a whole 72 hours in order to teach all 170 staff about such issues as ‘elf and safety, environment, wellbeing, marketing, and the latest manufacturing technologies. Staff will also be trained on pollution prevention, hygiene, the safety aspects of asbestos and cost busting (the two go hand-in hand!). More gold stars to Leeds boss Andy Hume as this wasn’t an idea he came up with in the bath to move him closer to an MBE; this initiative was actually put forward as a suggestion from the staff themselves and if the mammoth training session proves successful the scheme will be rolled out by the firm nationwide. Cheers!

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Funky online fashion retailer asos (as seen on screen) has given the retail pessimists a make-over with credit crunch chomping sales figures. People are switching to the internet to shop, so they have doubled their sales (see the vid we made of them last week). Asos made its name by selling its own clothing modelled on designs worn by celebrities, such as Kate Moss and Sienna Miller. It now sells more than 17,000 products, including designs by 600 other brands, such as French Connection and Calvin Klein. A recent survey by PriceWaterhouseCoopers claimed that more than half of all retail sales growth would come from online between now and 2012. With eyes on toppling Next, analysts all agree that asos is in a position to ride out any recession so they’re a great career bet.

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As proof that the future lies overseas, Condé Nast launches the 15th global edition of it’s GQ magazine today…in India. The men of Mumbai can gen up on Bollywood, cricket, fashion and male moisturiser are as 35,000 copies flood 40 Indian towns priced at just over £1. This follows the success of the launch of an Indian Vogue by the same publisher last year after gaining permission from the Indian government to own 100% of its Indian subsidiary, as opposed to having to leave some of it in State hands or with an Indian business backer. The GQ brand has been bothering newsagents’ shelves since 1957, when it was launched as a fashion spin-off of Esquire.

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